Tuesday, November 28, 2006
Monday, November 27, 2006
we made the internet!!!
not "made" like "create."
"made" like "made the front page."
anyway... just check us out
the password: es
i did go about getting these pictures in an unfavorable way (i used PrintKey), so i won't post the pictures since i haven't paid for them yet. but i won't feel so bad once i pay for them and scan them into my computer. maybe i'll post them then. but until i pay for them... have fun looking at me in a slightly smaller res.
"made" like "made the front page."
anyway... just check us out
the password: es
i did go about getting these pictures in an unfavorable way (i used PrintKey), so i won't post the pictures since i haven't paid for them yet. but i won't feel so bad once i pay for them and scan them into my computer. maybe i'll post them then. but until i pay for them... have fun looking at me in a slightly smaller res.
Saturday, November 25, 2006
holiday get togethers
every night this week, i've gone to bed early.
except last night.
i was up until 2 am.
that's what happens when you surround yourself with the coolest people you know.
i gotta say, i never met a hutchison or a crow i didn't like. holly and jamin are pretty cool, too.
look at what jamin showed me...
and then brooke pointed this out
and this
plus add in about 4 hours of mafia, and you've got yourself a great evening.
i've been to some crazy parties before. ones where cops show up. ones where cops probably should have shown up. ones where you see things you swore weren't possible.
but this party didn't have any of that. and it still blows away any of the parties i was going to 3 years ago.
thanks for an awesome friday night, everyone! i can't wait for the next gettogether!!!
except last night.
i was up until 2 am.
that's what happens when you surround yourself with the coolest people you know.
i gotta say, i never met a hutchison or a crow i didn't like. holly and jamin are pretty cool, too.
look at what jamin showed me...
and then brooke pointed this out
and this
plus add in about 4 hours of mafia, and you've got yourself a great evening.
i've been to some crazy parties before. ones where cops show up. ones where cops probably should have shown up. ones where you see things you swore weren't possible.
but this party didn't have any of that. and it still blows away any of the parties i was going to 3 years ago.
thanks for an awesome friday night, everyone! i can't wait for the next gettogether!!!
Tuesday, November 21, 2006
Monday, November 20, 2006
microwave
i watched this and realized that when i bought a microwave, it's b/c i "needed" a microwave. i think i even put it on a credit card.
two stupid decisions. from now on, i think i'll plan more than an hour into my day so i can eat a baked potato and not use witchcraft.
this kind of goes along with something i've been thinking about lately.
last time i was at "big church," we had communion. then i went to mcdonald's.
how can i be taking in something representing the body of christ and his blood one minute, and then scarfing down the mcrib the next??? it really got me thinking about what sort of foods i take in. i don't want to mix my jesusflesh with rib sauce anymore.
i had a ton of homework this week
...but you wouldn't know it from this.
i had been smelling something kind of funky in my apartment for a few days. but it just came and went.
then i figured out it was coming from the fridge.
so i cleaned it out.
but it was STILL in there.
then i figured out it the chicken had gone bad before it's sell by date.
i need to get a fridge air freshener.
i had been smelling something kind of funky in my apartment for a few days. but it just came and went.
then i figured out it was coming from the fridge.
so i cleaned it out.
but it was STILL in there.
then i figured out it the chicken had gone bad before it's sell by date.
i need to get a fridge air freshener.
Sunday, November 19, 2006
i'm george harrison
whoa... this is extremely fun!thanks, megan!
| See me morph into George Harrison |
| Create your own Celebrity Morph™ on MyHeritage.com |
Saturday, November 18, 2006
movin' on up!
we might have a winner here...
it's totally confusing inside. no two rooms are colored the same. there's only one ceiling upstairs that isn't flat. and it has a fountain. plus two fireplaces.
it didn't really give me that feeling of "ok, let's try to get this. i'm done looking." but it's definitely been my favorite so far. and eli's and sarah's, too.
plus, my favorite part of it... it's geothermal heated/cooled. the utility bill in the winter would be cheaper than my utility bill in my 500 sq. ft. apartment.
monthly gas bill: around 30 bucks.
monthly electric bill: around 100 bucks.
plus, the energy conserved is waaaay better for the environment. i imagine it would be even easier to heat if we burnt more firewood... but i don't know how environmentally sound that idea is.
but who cares??? SMORES IN THE LIVING ROOM, DUDE!!! Link
refreshing
yes... it's another relevant article.
it makes a good point.
it's easy for us to sit in our american homes with our american jobs and make american money and not even think of what people have to deal with on a daily basis.
and that's our struggle.
there are other people in other countries losing limbs and catching diseases, yet we feel impervious to any of that.
and that's our attack. that's what's killing us. we get to sit in luxury and forget that there are inhumane conditions everywhere else in the world.
it really makes me wonder why we sit here at work and worry about some customer not getting his part for a mining machine b/c he's loosing 500 grand a day.
big deal!
at least he's not ducking bullets and not knowing if he will see his kids come back from school every day.
if they even have a school to go to.
Friday, November 17, 2006
3 things
if you've spent any amount of time in church, you've most likely heard a repeat somewhere along the way. it's inevitable. it's gonna happen eventually. i mean... there's only so much bible out there. not like we can go along making up new verses.
but there are three common themes i keep hearing. they seem to stick out to me.
1. forgiveness
2. obedience
3. grace
they're all related, and here's how i see them intermingling.
one and two kind of don't go together.
i mean, if you're obedient, why do you need forgiveness? that just doesn't make sense. God wants us to be obedient, then fine. we should do what we're told. obedience.
but we don't do what we're told. we know the rules, but we break them all the time. sometimes we're just angry and quit caring. sometimes we give into temptation. sometimes we just totally ignore the rules to do what we want.
so why do we keep getting forgiven? i hear it all the time, "confess your sins and you will be forgiven."
i guess we need to keep hearing this b/c we keep messing up. we keep breaking the rules.
but we also keep getting forgiven.
but why???
b/c of number 3.
grace.
and like a nerd, i'm going to quote Lord of the Rings: The Fellowship of the Ring.
"What Grace is given me, let it pass to him. Let him be spared. Save him."
i always liked that line, and knowing that i am disobedient, but i'm forgiven, this shows me what grace is. grace is a life-saving device.
it's there for when we need forgiveness even when we're undeserving.
but there are three common themes i keep hearing. they seem to stick out to me.
1. forgiveness
2. obedience
3. grace
they're all related, and here's how i see them intermingling.
one and two kind of don't go together.
i mean, if you're obedient, why do you need forgiveness? that just doesn't make sense. God wants us to be obedient, then fine. we should do what we're told. obedience.
but we don't do what we're told. we know the rules, but we break them all the time. sometimes we're just angry and quit caring. sometimes we give into temptation. sometimes we just totally ignore the rules to do what we want.
so why do we keep getting forgiven? i hear it all the time, "confess your sins and you will be forgiven."
i guess we need to keep hearing this b/c we keep messing up. we keep breaking the rules.
but we also keep getting forgiven.
but why???
b/c of number 3.
grace.
and like a nerd, i'm going to quote Lord of the Rings: The Fellowship of the Ring.
"What Grace is given me, let it pass to him. Let him be spared. Save him."
i always liked that line, and knowing that i am disobedient, but i'm forgiven, this shows me what grace is. grace is a life-saving device.
it's there for when we need forgiveness even when we're undeserving.
Tuesday, November 14, 2006
fired!
i got tired of things not working with safari.
so i got firefox.
only to find that it has different annoyances.
some things are better...
but some things are worse.
i do enjoy frames within the window.
but that's all i can think of now.
and i really hate that pop-up pictures don't pop the right way. and the slideshow on remax.com won't play. at least with safari i got to see all of the pictures. ...and i got to see all of the picture i'm trying to view.
stupid browsers.
so i got firefox.
only to find that it has different annoyances.
some things are better...
but some things are worse.
i do enjoy frames within the window.
but that's all i can think of now.
and i really hate that pop-up pictures don't pop the right way. and the slideshow on remax.com won't play. at least with safari i got to see all of the pictures. ...and i got to see all of the picture i'm trying to view.
stupid browsers.
provide an encouraging word
alright, i won't link to yet another relevant article...
but i will quote one.
I want to remind myself what it felt like when people indifferently shrugged off my frustrations. I will try to keep potential difficulties and frustrations from holding me back from supporting new ideas that come along.
Most importantly, I will pray that when someone approaches me with concerns about the new ministry they care passionately about, that I will walk beside them and put an arm around their shoulders, instead of indifferently shrugging my own.
this part really says something for me. the whole article was great, but i can usually find one part that stands alone, and these two paragraphs are just that.
to sum up this article's feeling, i'm just going to copy what relevant used for a tagline. "One person's struggle to not cave into apathy and find God while beginning a new ministry."
i've experienced this. and it's amazing who the people turn out to be that indifferently shrug off your frustrations. or who just turn your frustrations into their own.
but i'll try to keep a positive attitude b/c i know some of them were in my frustrated shoes at once.
one more quote to end this post...
"It should be comforting to learn that I am not alone in having experienced this, but instead it frightens me."
http://www.relevantmagazine.com/god_article.php?id=7247 Link
but i will quote one.
I want to remind myself what it felt like when people indifferently shrugged off my frustrations. I will try to keep potential difficulties and frustrations from holding me back from supporting new ideas that come along.
Most importantly, I will pray that when someone approaches me with concerns about the new ministry they care passionately about, that I will walk beside them and put an arm around their shoulders, instead of indifferently shrugging my own.
this part really says something for me. the whole article was great, but i can usually find one part that stands alone, and these two paragraphs are just that.
to sum up this article's feeling, i'm just going to copy what relevant used for a tagline. "One person's struggle to not cave into apathy and find God while beginning a new ministry."
i've experienced this. and it's amazing who the people turn out to be that indifferently shrug off your frustrations. or who just turn your frustrations into their own.
but i'll try to keep a positive attitude b/c i know some of them were in my frustrated shoes at once.
one more quote to end this post...
"It should be comforting to learn that I am not alone in having experienced this, but instead it frightens me."
http://www.relevantmagazine.com/god_article.php?id=7247 Link
traveling
as sarah and i plan stuff out (the wedding, but more importantly the honeymoon), i've been thinking about flying a lot lately.
then at confession this weekend jr had the high school and jr high pastors speak. and they talked about life as a journey and WHO you're traveling with and WHAT you bring along.
this relevant article (i know there's a lot of them) seemed to go along quite nicely with that talk.
brian (jr high guy) told us about he and his family (wife and two kids) went to disneyland. it's the greatest place on earth, right? but how fun would it have been if he would have gone and pretended his family wasn't there?
answer: not very.
then aaron (sr high guy) brought out some luggage and talked about what we bring along and being weighed down by it.
all very good travel advice.
i'm going to try to remember this on the 25 hour flight to sydney next september. maybe i'll leave the ipod in the luggage compartment and make some 'stralian friends.
then at confession this weekend jr had the high school and jr high pastors speak. and they talked about life as a journey and WHO you're traveling with and WHAT you bring along.
this relevant article (i know there's a lot of them) seemed to go along quite nicely with that talk.
brian (jr high guy) told us about he and his family (wife and two kids) went to disneyland. it's the greatest place on earth, right? but how fun would it have been if he would have gone and pretended his family wasn't there?
answer: not very.
then aaron (sr high guy) brought out some luggage and talked about what we bring along and being weighed down by it.
all very good travel advice.
i'm going to try to remember this on the 25 hour flight to sydney next september. maybe i'll leave the ipod in the luggage compartment and make some 'stralian friends.
see what happens...
when you don't blog regularly?
i was driving to work today realizing how scatter-brained this previous post really was.
that was the culmination of about 3 or 4 different things running through my mind that i've been thinking about blogging... and then they all ended up in one.
oops.
i hate reading posts like that (in fact, i usually just stop reading halfway through), and i hate writing posts like that (in fact, i try to stop writing about halfway through).
so, i apologize for the crappy post. i'll try to post more frequently with one deal at a time.
i was driving to work today realizing how scatter-brained this previous post really was.
that was the culmination of about 3 or 4 different things running through my mind that i've been thinking about blogging... and then they all ended up in one.
oops.
i hate reading posts like that (in fact, i usually just stop reading halfway through), and i hate writing posts like that (in fact, i try to stop writing about halfway through).
so, i apologize for the crappy post. i'll try to post more frequently with one deal at a time.
self-esteem campaign
i got this from megan and her shard items.
that woman wasn't all that bad-looking before she started... and then she ends up looking pretty good afterwards. but wow... it took a lot of work. and i would argue it's not even that dramatic of an improvement. she looks good afterwards, yeah. i'll admit that. but was it worth all that work just to make her neck look longer and her eyes look bigger???
no wonder marriages fail when guys expect their wives to look like that. maybe if every husband was a combination makeup artist/hair dresser/photographer/graphic artist, then they could be married to billboard-worthy supermodels.
but to be realistic... girls wear sweatpants. and there's nothing wrong with that.
that woman wasn't all that bad-looking before she started... and then she ends up looking pretty good afterwards. but wow... it took a lot of work. and i would argue it's not even that dramatic of an improvement. she looks good afterwards, yeah. i'll admit that. but was it worth all that work just to make her neck look longer and her eyes look bigger???
no wonder marriages fail when guys expect their wives to look like that. maybe if every husband was a combination makeup artist/hair dresser/photographer/graphic artist, then they could be married to billboard-worthy supermodels.
but to be realistic... girls wear sweatpants. and there's nothing wrong with that.
Monday, November 13, 2006
i'm not an adult
but i pretend to be one in real life.
sarah and i went to get preapproved for this today. and while we were at cefcu, we went ahead and combined our accounts so we have joint checking/savings/miscellaneous banking stuff together.
i walked out of the credit union with a whole new perspective.
first off...
we can't afford that house.
after we escrowed in all the taxes and home insurance and all the other home-buying crap, that house was going to cost us over a thousand dollars a month.
is a third of your income supposed to go to housing? really???
we went to cyd's afterwards to talk to them about our desserts for the reception. BEST DESSERT I'VE EVER HAD. so good it made me nauseous. ya know how they say, "don't go to the grocery store hungry?" well, the saying should extend its warning to say "or dessert lady's."
i was presented with a plate full of so many confections that i didn't even have time to think to take a picture of it... i just inhaled it. then i realized that pastries on an empty stomach is worse than an empty stomach.
all the while still a little disappointed that sarah and i can't afford our dream home at age 24. (which might have had something to do with my upset stomach).
as i grow up, i have to learn not to get the best of the best right away. sometimes it's better not to splurge on the best quality item. it pays to save. and that's what we have to do. instead of looking at houses at the top of our range, we need to be looking at houses at the bottom of our range. why do we need to start at the top?
oh that's right... we're american. we're used to getting what we want when we want it.
i'm becoming intensely aware of the fact that i can leave a dessert lady's business, drive miles away in 40 degree weather to a schlotzkie's, and order any sort of soup, sandwich, or pizza that i want.
i was in church this weekend and i realized that i cannot go the rest of my life w/o knowing how the rest of the world lives. for all my struggles, i still don't have to worry about where to get water from in the morning. i turn a lever and it comes pouring out. RIGHT IN MY OWN HOME!
it's easy for me to believe in God. i need to go somewhere where people doubt God, and rightfully so. a friend who is getting back from africa on the 18th showed me a book someone gave her a few days before she left this past week.
there was one page of an old woman whose face was not quite as pretty as my baseball glove. the text next to her full page picture had a line that's stuck with me. it was a list of our choices on a day-to-day basis. that list was full of crap like, "cappucino or frappucino? high octane or low octane? button up or polo? sedan or SUV? spring or mineral?" the list for this old lady went something like, "blue dress or blue dress? muddy water or muddy water? walk or run? candles or darkness?" the one line that i mentioned that stuck with me...
"sleep with the fisherman to earn money, or let my grandchildren starve?"
how can that woman even believe in in a god at all when she hasn't experienced anything that would show her God's love????
if that woman told me she didn't believe in God, i wouldn't blame her.
and i don't think i can go the rest of my life worrying about which fast food to eat when this woman worries about which meals are even available.
could i really live a life that where it's easy for me to live? do i understand what life is and what salvation is when i have everything handed to me???
suddenly... i don't think i need a dream home.
sarah and i went to get preapproved for this today. and while we were at cefcu, we went ahead and combined our accounts so we have joint checking/savings/miscellaneous banking stuff together.
i walked out of the credit union with a whole new perspective.
first off...
we can't afford that house.
after we escrowed in all the taxes and home insurance and all the other home-buying crap, that house was going to cost us over a thousand dollars a month.
is a third of your income supposed to go to housing? really???
we went to cyd's afterwards to talk to them about our desserts for the reception. BEST DESSERT I'VE EVER HAD. so good it made me nauseous. ya know how they say, "don't go to the grocery store hungry?" well, the saying should extend its warning to say "or dessert lady's."
i was presented with a plate full of so many confections that i didn't even have time to think to take a picture of it... i just inhaled it. then i realized that pastries on an empty stomach is worse than an empty stomach.
all the while still a little disappointed that sarah and i can't afford our dream home at age 24. (which might have had something to do with my upset stomach).
as i grow up, i have to learn not to get the best of the best right away. sometimes it's better not to splurge on the best quality item. it pays to save. and that's what we have to do. instead of looking at houses at the top of our range, we need to be looking at houses at the bottom of our range. why do we need to start at the top?
oh that's right... we're american. we're used to getting what we want when we want it.
i'm becoming intensely aware of the fact that i can leave a dessert lady's business, drive miles away in 40 degree weather to a schlotzkie's, and order any sort of soup, sandwich, or pizza that i want.
i was in church this weekend and i realized that i cannot go the rest of my life w/o knowing how the rest of the world lives. for all my struggles, i still don't have to worry about where to get water from in the morning. i turn a lever and it comes pouring out. RIGHT IN MY OWN HOME!
it's easy for me to believe in God. i need to go somewhere where people doubt God, and rightfully so. a friend who is getting back from africa on the 18th showed me a book someone gave her a few days before she left this past week.
there was one page of an old woman whose face was not quite as pretty as my baseball glove. the text next to her full page picture had a line that's stuck with me. it was a list of our choices on a day-to-day basis. that list was full of crap like, "cappucino or frappucino? high octane or low octane? button up or polo? sedan or SUV? spring or mineral?" the list for this old lady went something like, "blue dress or blue dress? muddy water or muddy water? walk or run? candles or darkness?" the one line that i mentioned that stuck with me...
"sleep with the fisherman to earn money, or let my grandchildren starve?"
how can that woman even believe in in a god at all when she hasn't experienced anything that would show her God's love????
if that woman told me she didn't believe in God, i wouldn't blame her.
and i don't think i can go the rest of my life worrying about which fast food to eat when this woman worries about which meals are even available.
could i really live a life that where it's easy for me to live? do i understand what life is and what salvation is when i have everything handed to me???
suddenly... i don't think i need a dream home.
Friday, November 10, 2006
to be relevant
i haven't had anything great come from my rss feed on relevant for a while, but i liked this one today.
as is typical with relevant's articles, the last couple paragraphs are the best.
plus, it talks about fire being cleansing. which i like. i'm still amazed at that experience.
plus, my brother and i are firebugs. if it burns, we're probably interested. if it explodes, we're definitely interested.
fire fall down, fire fall down, fire fall down
on us
we pray.
as is typical with relevant's articles, the last couple paragraphs are the best.
plus, it talks about fire being cleansing. which i like. i'm still amazed at that experience.
plus, my brother and i are firebugs. if it burns, we're probably interested. if it explodes, we're definitely interested.
fire fall down, fire fall down, fire fall down
on us
we pray.
Wednesday, November 08, 2006
make giving fair
after that last post, i came across this in my rss feed.
again, i don't think i need to say much more than what it already said.
but i have been thinking a lot lately about where my money goes. especially planning the honeymoon. it's seriously expensive to fly to australia. everybody's saying that we should take it if we can b/c "when else will you get to do something like that???"
well, when else will we be able to feed a whole village for a month with one monetary gift?
sarah was thinking about giving donations to things instead of giving party favors at the reception.
cool idea except some people might actually want something in their hands... right now i'm thinking... "too bad."
sarah even went as far to say that she was thinking about asking everyone to spend the money the would be using for a gift and just donating to something in our name and giving us a card with what you donated to.
good idea except... we need stuff. and i don't think some people would want to do that.
those are two crappy excuses, so we might still end up asking that.
but i swear, if you give us a toaster, or a ton of towels, you'll get pictures in the mail of us returning that stuff.
and then a card of a donation in your name to a charity.
for the price of a toaster.
all this to say... i quit tithing to church. xxxchurch has an online donation feature, and it took under two minutes. and i'm completely on-board with what they do. there aren't too many places you can give money to where you can say that.
it's a consumer's world out there.
and there's no better way to make your money count than to give it all away. Link
again, i don't think i need to say much more than what it already said.
but i have been thinking a lot lately about where my money goes. especially planning the honeymoon. it's seriously expensive to fly to australia. everybody's saying that we should take it if we can b/c "when else will you get to do something like that???"
well, when else will we be able to feed a whole village for a month with one monetary gift?
sarah was thinking about giving donations to things instead of giving party favors at the reception.
cool idea except some people might actually want something in their hands... right now i'm thinking... "too bad."
sarah even went as far to say that she was thinking about asking everyone to spend the money the would be using for a gift and just donating to something in our name and giving us a card with what you donated to.
good idea except... we need stuff. and i don't think some people would want to do that.
those are two crappy excuses, so we might still end up asking that.
but i swear, if you give us a toaster, or a ton of towels, you'll get pictures in the mail of us returning that stuff.
and then a card of a donation in your name to a charity.
for the price of a toaster.
all this to say... i quit tithing to church. xxxchurch has an online donation feature, and it took under two minutes. and i'm completely on-board with what they do. there aren't too many places you can give money to where you can say that.
it's a consumer's world out there.
and there's no better way to make your money count than to give it all away. Link
sobering fact #23
reading relevant, i came across this.
and felt ill.
if christians had given the traditional 10 percent tithe of their income to their churches in 2004, instead of the 2.56 percent that they actually gave, there would have been an additional $164 billion available, according to a report released in october called "the state of church giving through 2004." if the churches chose to funnel just $70 - $80 billion of that additional income to missions and humanitarian works, the basic needs of every person on the globe would be provided.
i'll just let this post speak for itself.
Monday, November 06, 2006
brothers gotta hug!
Sunday, November 05, 2006
cynicism
i realize my posting this week has been pretty cynical.
i guess when you go through that punk phase in highschool/college, you don't lose all of your ideology. for now, that's a good thing. i'll keep it.
i had been wondering if all those halloween posts and posts about what sucks about church/christianity were over the top. i was supersensitive to any feedback and i think i took it personally. or it made me angry when someone else took it personally.
i'll still stand by my complaints. the church is never going to be perfect, but when i see a blatant disregard for an attempt at perfection, i got angry.
perfection for me is admitting you're not perfect, and (here's the big part) NOT COMING DOWN ON OTHERS FOR NOT BEING PERFECT.
plus, i have to seemingly go back on my post about using christian phrases on nonbelievers.
i've had wild success with the term, "i'll pray for you."
it's my new secret weapon.
something awemazing happens when you show someone you're concerned for them. concerned so much, in fact, that you will go to God with something about them.
i have a friend at work who i've deemed "the sister i've never wanted." (sounds harsh, but it's really a term of endearment). she's awesome. totally innocent and caring. and i've felt for a long time that i should invite her and her husband to church.
she's never been inside a church.
yet, when she was talking to me about her husband needing a new job (she was on 1st shift and he was on 2nd), i got really nervous, but i told her i would pray for her.
this was a string of e-mail conversations, so i was pretty anxious to see what she would write back.
she ended up saying she would really appreciate that. but what's even MORE impressive is that she started telling me that she really felt like she needed to pray more and rely more on God than herself and how she knew she wouldn't be anything without him.
wildy successful interaction. this girl who had never set foot inside a church is hoping for God to care enough to listen to her. now where did she learn that?!?
i have other examples, but i'll keep them to myself.
all this to say, i've been too cynical. i have a critical mind and a perfectionist personality. that combined with the occasional flare-up of my DTM punk days, i admit i get too judgmental of the church.
i still won't blindly follow a pastor who wants to broadcast that nonbelievers are being laughed at, or any pastor for that reason. after all, you pastor types are just regular people and want to be held at regular people reckoning.
but i won't go against the message i'm trying to live myself by demeaning someone else for their actions.
soldiers are dying to protect your right to burn the flag they swore to, and i won't get in your way of "humbling" nonbelievers in order to show them christ's love. if i did that, then wouldn't i be a hypocrite? i want sinners to feel loved, and i should want believers to feel loved.
just don't expect me to agree with everything coming from the pulpit.
i guess when you go through that punk phase in highschool/college, you don't lose all of your ideology. for now, that's a good thing. i'll keep it.
i had been wondering if all those halloween posts and posts about what sucks about church/christianity were over the top. i was supersensitive to any feedback and i think i took it personally. or it made me angry when someone else took it personally.
i'll still stand by my complaints. the church is never going to be perfect, but when i see a blatant disregard for an attempt at perfection, i got angry.
perfection for me is admitting you're not perfect, and (here's the big part) NOT COMING DOWN ON OTHERS FOR NOT BEING PERFECT.
plus, i have to seemingly go back on my post about using christian phrases on nonbelievers.
i've had wild success with the term, "i'll pray for you."
it's my new secret weapon.
something awemazing happens when you show someone you're concerned for them. concerned so much, in fact, that you will go to God with something about them.
i have a friend at work who i've deemed "the sister i've never wanted." (sounds harsh, but it's really a term of endearment). she's awesome. totally innocent and caring. and i've felt for a long time that i should invite her and her husband to church.
she's never been inside a church.
yet, when she was talking to me about her husband needing a new job (she was on 1st shift and he was on 2nd), i got really nervous, but i told her i would pray for her.
this was a string of e-mail conversations, so i was pretty anxious to see what she would write back.
she ended up saying she would really appreciate that. but what's even MORE impressive is that she started telling me that she really felt like she needed to pray more and rely more on God than herself and how she knew she wouldn't be anything without him.
wildy successful interaction. this girl who had never set foot inside a church is hoping for God to care enough to listen to her. now where did she learn that?!?
i have other examples, but i'll keep them to myself.
all this to say, i've been too cynical. i have a critical mind and a perfectionist personality. that combined with the occasional flare-up of my DTM punk days, i admit i get too judgmental of the church.
i still won't blindly follow a pastor who wants to broadcast that nonbelievers are being laughed at, or any pastor for that reason. after all, you pastor types are just regular people and want to be held at regular people reckoning.
but i won't go against the message i'm trying to live myself by demeaning someone else for their actions.
soldiers are dying to protect your right to burn the flag they swore to, and i won't get in your way of "humbling" nonbelievers in order to show them christ's love. if i did that, then wouldn't i be a hypocrite? i want sinners to feel loved, and i should want believers to feel loved.
just don't expect me to agree with everything coming from the pulpit.
half in/half out
i read an awesome article by david crowder in relevant a while back. i wish i could link to it, but you'll just have to start reading relevant. crowder's got an article in each issue now (except for the most recent one...).
and it's always something to wrap your mind around.
here's a paragraph from his article, "a costly faith: lessons from a pawnshop van." it's in the sept_oct 2006 issue.
"i think we live in a space divided. i think jesus insisted that the kingdom of heave was not just a apace we would later inhabit, but also on that he was bringing here and now. that it is surrounding us. that we are walking around in it. that we are bringing it. that the eternal begins now. here. we exist with one foot here in the early and one in the eternal. yet we rarely feel it. we rarely live with a sense that someone should take a picture. that what is happening right now bears documentation. that we're in two places at one."
crowder was talking about how we don't think about death nearly enough. we're in the present, and nothing else.
but the part that really got me thinking was that we're in two places at once. if you're a believer, you know that your body will end someday, but you've got a soul and it's unstoppable. it goes... somewhere. and the two are related. your soul speaks to your body and your body can override the soul.
so we're really a soul, since that's the eternal part of us, and we're stuck in this fleshy thing here... what do we really look like? what are we really thinking? what are our personalities really like? the phrase "fish out of water" comes to mind.
these thoughts have stuck with me for a while now. (there are more thoughts, but i won't run rampant with them right now).
while i was doing some homework, i was reviewing a classmates website (it's required that we review two of our classmates projects and comment on them).
this guy likes photography, and scuba diving. so guess what his site is about? underwater photography! well... sort of. it's more about diving than photography, but he's got a lot of photos on his site.
i saw this one and had a thought.
that thing (whatever it is) is beautiful. i can imagine it underwater swaying with the current. it's got so many surfaces and colors on it, it's a lot to look at. that one little thing probably has as much surface area as we do.
but i bet it's ugly when it washes up on the beach.
i bet you wouldn't even know what it is if you saw it.
you might even think it's garbage washed ashore.
and it might hurt if you step on it (i don't know that for sure, but it looks potentially dangerous!)
so let's set this up in an analogy...
if that sea creature belongs in the sea, but ends up on the earth and it is totally out of its element and struggles just to survive, then if we're a soul, but we're on earth, are we struggling to survive? are we really more beautiful than we perceive b/c we're not at home? can we even know what we really are when we're just visiting? has anyone mistaken you for garbage? (or have you ever treated someone like garbage?) do we hurt people when they step on us? if someone came by to throw you back into the ocean, would you sting them?
more and more rampant thoughts... but i'll just sit on this for a while. i like nature analogies, but i don't like being stung.
and i don't like thinking that i'm messing up here, while i'm existing somewhere else, too.
the tagline from crowder's article...
"jesus insisted that the kingdom of heaven was not just a space we would later inhabit ... "
and it's always something to wrap your mind around.
here's a paragraph from his article, "a costly faith: lessons from a pawnshop van." it's in the sept_oct 2006 issue.
"i think we live in a space divided. i think jesus insisted that the kingdom of heave was not just a apace we would later inhabit, but also on that he was bringing here and now. that it is surrounding us. that we are walking around in it. that we are bringing it. that the eternal begins now. here. we exist with one foot here in the early and one in the eternal. yet we rarely feel it. we rarely live with a sense that someone should take a picture. that what is happening right now bears documentation. that we're in two places at one."
crowder was talking about how we don't think about death nearly enough. we're in the present, and nothing else.
but the part that really got me thinking was that we're in two places at once. if you're a believer, you know that your body will end someday, but you've got a soul and it's unstoppable. it goes... somewhere. and the two are related. your soul speaks to your body and your body can override the soul.
so we're really a soul, since that's the eternal part of us, and we're stuck in this fleshy thing here... what do we really look like? what are we really thinking? what are our personalities really like? the phrase "fish out of water" comes to mind.
these thoughts have stuck with me for a while now. (there are more thoughts, but i won't run rampant with them right now).
while i was doing some homework, i was reviewing a classmates website (it's required that we review two of our classmates projects and comment on them).
this guy likes photography, and scuba diving. so guess what his site is about? underwater photography! well... sort of. it's more about diving than photography, but he's got a lot of photos on his site.
i saw this one and had a thought.
that thing (whatever it is) is beautiful. i can imagine it underwater swaying with the current. it's got so many surfaces and colors on it, it's a lot to look at. that one little thing probably has as much surface area as we do.
but i bet it's ugly when it washes up on the beach.
i bet you wouldn't even know what it is if you saw it.
you might even think it's garbage washed ashore.
and it might hurt if you step on it (i don't know that for sure, but it looks potentially dangerous!)
so let's set this up in an analogy...
if that sea creature belongs in the sea, but ends up on the earth and it is totally out of its element and struggles just to survive, then if we're a soul, but we're on earth, are we struggling to survive? are we really more beautiful than we perceive b/c we're not at home? can we even know what we really are when we're just visiting? has anyone mistaken you for garbage? (or have you ever treated someone like garbage?) do we hurt people when they step on us? if someone came by to throw you back into the ocean, would you sting them?
more and more rampant thoughts... but i'll just sit on this for a while. i like nature analogies, but i don't like being stung.
and i don't like thinking that i'm messing up here, while i'm existing somewhere else, too.
the tagline from crowder's article...
"jesus insisted that the kingdom of heaven was not just a space we would later inhabit ... "
Friday, November 03, 2006
blogging off steam ?
this one isn't an angry one. but it's every bit as emotional for me. in fact, i almost feel like making a new blog just for this post. i'm not trying to air dirty laundry... this honestly helps.
i know it feels wrong to admit fault when you don’t feel like you’re wrong. when you know you’re right.
but i’m coming to you with this, i’m asking you to be the one to initiate the “sorries” because i think of everyone, you’re the one that is the most grown up. you are the reasonable one.
i’m not asking you to go to your mom and say, “i was totally wrong, you were totally right. i’ll do whatever it takes to set things right,” but i am asking you to be the one who works at it. make grandma, your mom, feel like things are better. she doesn’t have to be convinced that everything is perfect. that would be unreasonable even for her, but just try to give her something to look forward to. something she can’t deny is better than before you talked to her. i would love to see you be the one who puts forth the effort to do what it takes for the other person to feel better. to feel loved.
after all, that’s all family is called to do. we just have to love each other. and it’s not always easy, and it may feel like defeat even, but it’s what each one of us has to do.
i know it feels wrong to admit fault when you don’t feel like you’re wrong. when you know you’re right.
but i’m coming to you with this, i’m asking you to be the one to initiate the “sorries” because i think of everyone, you’re the one that is the most grown up. you are the reasonable one.
i’m not asking you to go to your mom and say, “i was totally wrong, you were totally right. i’ll do whatever it takes to set things right,” but i am asking you to be the one who works at it. make grandma, your mom, feel like things are better. she doesn’t have to be convinced that everything is perfect. that would be unreasonable even for her, but just try to give her something to look forward to. something she can’t deny is better than before you talked to her. i would love to see you be the one who puts forth the effort to do what it takes for the other person to feel better. to feel loved.
after all, that’s all family is called to do. we just have to love each other. and it’s not always easy, and it may feel like defeat even, but it’s what each one of us has to do.
Thursday, November 02, 2006
time to join the circus
i can't believe i just did this... i was heating up a cup of water for green tea, and there was a pocket knife on top of my microwave (b/c duh... where else am i going to keep a pocket knife?) and i was just bored for the minute 20 that it takes to heat up a cup of water when i hit the "beverage" button.
so i picked up the knife, opened it, heard that familiar "click," threw it across the room, and then did THIS.
my mind instantly jumped to how cool macgyver, john locke, mr. t, walker texas ranger, crocodile dundee, and yoda would be proud of me.
so i picked up the knife, opened it, heard that familiar "click," threw it across the room, and then did THIS.
my mind instantly jumped to how cool macgyver, john locke, mr. t, walker texas ranger, crocodile dundee, and yoda would be proud of me.
mystery shopper
awesome
this got me thinking...
each one of those steps this couple went through to get to the service... parking lot, greeter, kid check-in, coffee, service... do they all communicate together?
or is it just one group doing the coffee, one group doing the children check-in, another separate entity in charge of this and of that?
how often do we think of each department as part of a whole? it's the whole package that people see... not just how the coffee tastes or just the greeters... ya gotta be sensitive to everything. b/c that's what newbies see.
everything. Link
this got me thinking...
each one of those steps this couple went through to get to the service... parking lot, greeter, kid check-in, coffee, service... do they all communicate together?
or is it just one group doing the coffee, one group doing the children check-in, another separate entity in charge of this and of that?
how often do we think of each department as part of a whole? it's the whole package that people see... not just how the coffee tastes or just the greeters... ya gotta be sensitive to everything. b/c that's what newbies see.
everything. Link
Wednesday, November 01, 2006
one last halloween post...
i think this guy has it right.
and not just about halloween, about everything the church does.
this leads into a post i've been pondering a while... christians are weird, man.
yeah yeah, we're called to be different, but let's be realistic.
if you start and end every sentence in a prayer with "lord," are you really, honestly, SERIOUSLY thinking about what you're saying? shouldn't you be MORE mindful of your words when you pray? you're talking to God, man.
and i'm starting a list... a list of words/phrases that christians need to properly define instead of just saying all the time. or better yet... just quit using them. the rest of the world thinks it's weird, man.
honor
glory
praise
(sometimes those three in one phrase)
sanctify
glorify your name
beyond a shadow of a doubt
calling everyone "friend" or "brother/sister."
_____ to your name (insert any number of christian nouns here. subexamples; glory, honor, praise)
thwart
deliverER
everlasting
redemption (with the exception of shawshank)
arise
upon
among
be lifted on high
*****there is a TON of things to do with the heart that just don't make sense to unchurched people that we shouldn't use on them right away. a few of them are...
hearts speaking
having a heart specifically for something other than pumping blood (subexample; a heart for missions)
jesus living there
working on hearts (not in the surgery way)
hearts being spoken to
hardened hearts
also, we should quit naming ministries after scientific words. it conjures up too much science fiction, nerdy, hocus-pocus imagery. and we all know that sci-fi nerds just go to church to hit on chicks.
examples:
fusion
catalyst
area 51
the God zone
ignition
it's probably better to just name these groups what they are... "sr. high ministry, jr. high ministry, people out of high school ministry."
actually... nevermind that. just get a just get a cool/normal name.
and of course, these lists go on and on. but i won't post all of them here. feel free to post your own additions. i doubt this list will ever be complete.
i have to point out, though... i'm not saying christians should be exactly like the rest of the world. we just shouldn't be perceived as weird. nobody wants to join the nerds playing magic: the gathering at perkin's, and nobody wants to join a group of people that talk funny (like nerds playing magic: the gathering at perkin's).
all i'm saying is... why do we have to talk like medieval knights?
do you remember being in high school and reading shakespeare? well, the teachers all just knew that it was a great story. but you hated it. it was boring and didn't make much sense. it was written in english, but who could tell?
then you see a movie adapted for the screen from a shakespeare play and it's actually good.
then you realize why teachers like shakespeare... it's actually a good story... it's just clouded by weird words that are out of style, taught by people who don't like change, and NOT updated.
so i'm begging... please, please, PLEASE don't teach shakespeare at church. and don't try to impress those sinners at work with your holy talk. they'll just think you're a nerd if you ask them to come to SynRgy. then they'll tell everyone you play magic and had to cut your ponytail to work there. Link
and not just about halloween, about everything the church does.
this leads into a post i've been pondering a while... christians are weird, man.
yeah yeah, we're called to be different, but let's be realistic.
if you start and end every sentence in a prayer with "lord," are you really, honestly, SERIOUSLY thinking about what you're saying? shouldn't you be MORE mindful of your words when you pray? you're talking to God, man.
and i'm starting a list... a list of words/phrases that christians need to properly define instead of just saying all the time. or better yet... just quit using them. the rest of the world thinks it's weird, man.
honor
glory
praise
(sometimes those three in one phrase)
sanctify
glorify your name
beyond a shadow of a doubt
calling everyone "friend" or "brother/sister."
_____ to your name (insert any number of christian nouns here. subexamples; glory, honor, praise)
thwart
deliverER
everlasting
redemption (with the exception of shawshank)
arise
upon
among
be lifted on high
*****there is a TON of things to do with the heart that just don't make sense to unchurched people that we shouldn't use on them right away. a few of them are...
hearts speaking
having a heart specifically for something other than pumping blood (subexample; a heart for missions)
jesus living there
working on hearts (not in the surgery way)
hearts being spoken to
hardened hearts
also, we should quit naming ministries after scientific words. it conjures up too much science fiction, nerdy, hocus-pocus imagery. and we all know that sci-fi nerds just go to church to hit on chicks.
examples:
fusion
catalyst
area 51
the God zone
ignition
it's probably better to just name these groups what they are... "sr. high ministry, jr. high ministry, people out of high school ministry."
actually... nevermind that. just get a just get a cool/normal name.
and of course, these lists go on and on. but i won't post all of them here. feel free to post your own additions. i doubt this list will ever be complete.
i have to point out, though... i'm not saying christians should be exactly like the rest of the world. we just shouldn't be perceived as weird. nobody wants to join the nerds playing magic: the gathering at perkin's, and nobody wants to join a group of people that talk funny (like nerds playing magic: the gathering at perkin's).
all i'm saying is... why do we have to talk like medieval knights?
do you remember being in high school and reading shakespeare? well, the teachers all just knew that it was a great story. but you hated it. it was boring and didn't make much sense. it was written in english, but who could tell?
then you see a movie adapted for the screen from a shakespeare play and it's actually good.
then you realize why teachers like shakespeare... it's actually a good story... it's just clouded by weird words that are out of style, taught by people who don't like change, and NOT updated.
so i'm begging... please, please, PLEASE don't teach shakespeare at church. and don't try to impress those sinners at work with your holy talk. they'll just think you're a nerd if you ask them to come to SynRgy. then they'll tell everyone you play magic and had to cut your ponytail to work there. Link
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